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Humanity Is Severely Suppressing Their Natural Nature
Why People and Pets Love and Hurt Each Other—and How They Can Truly Coexist
Lu Xia | Original Reflections on Multidimensional Life Philosophy
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In recent years, the relationship between more and more families and their pets has no longer been one of healing and companionship. Instead, it has become an endless cycle of inner exhaustion, conflict, love, and hurt.
I have seen too many guardians become irritated, angry, and disappointed because their pets were not obedient enough, quiet enough, or easy enough. I have seen guardians argue with their pets, pull against them, withdraw from them, and struggle for control. I have also seen countless people become so consumed by ongoing conflict with their pets that they lose sleep, carry emotional tension, become physically unwell, or gradually fall into anxiety, depression, and emotional turmoil.
We originally bring dogs into our lives to heal our days, receive warmth, and add joy. Why, then, do we end up tormenting one another, draining one another, and falling into a mutually low emotional state?
Many people treat pets as “toys that must please them,” forgetting that animals, too, are living beings—with sensitivity, emotions, instincts, awareness, and their own nature.
When raising children, we may be willing to embrace their growth, accept their innocence, and allow them to make mistakes. Why, then, when facing a dog, do we offer zero tolerance? Why do we deny instinct, expression, and natural behavior?
This article seeks to uncover a truth that many people do not wish to acknowledge: most conflicts between guardians and pets are not simply because a dog is “disobedient.” They arise when people use selfishness or lack of understanding to suppress an animal’s natural needs, creating harm in both directions.
Dogs are among humanity’s most loyal companion species. For thousands of years, their role alongside people has included guarding homes, alerting families, offering companionship, and responding to unfamiliar activity or possible danger.
When a dog hears movement outside, becomes alert, barks at an unfamiliar presence, or tries to warn its guardian of something unusual, this is not necessarily hyperactivity, illness, or disobedience. It can be part of its natural alertness, loyalty, and inherited behavioral patterns.
Yet modern urban pet life often turns this understanding upside down. People seek absolute quiet, absolute convenience, and absolute obedience. We begin to restrict a dog’s nature, deny its instincts, and suppress its awareness.
When a dog tries to guard the home, the guardian may call it noisy. When it responds instinctively to something unfamiliar, the guardian may become annoyed. When it expresses natural liveliness, the guardian may label it pathological. When it shows normal emotion, the guardian may try to correct, punish, or suppress it.
To make animals fit more comfortably into human routines, some people rely on excessive restraint, force, intimidation, or inappropriate medication. They may believe they are “training” an animal, when in fact they may be damaging the animal’s confidence, well-being, and ability to express normal behavior.
We can turn a living being that should be alert, loyal, bright, and expressive into a silent household decoration—afraid to move, afraid to bark, afraid to communicate, and afraid to act according to its nature.
Many people do not understand that rebellion, agitation, loss of control, anxious behavior, and stress responses are often not inborn flaws. They can arise after an animal has been repeatedly denied, suppressed, frightened, or prevented from expressing normal needs.
It is similar to a child who is constantly criticized, restrained, told not to cry, and never allowed to express themselves. Eventually, that child may lose emotional balance, become overwhelmed, or develop distorted ways of coping.
Pets, like children, can become more reactive when constantly suppressed, more unsettled when continually denied, and more overwhelmed when every outlet is blocked. Guardians may believe they are correcting a flaw, when they may actually be eroding trust, increasing fear, and creating emotional confusion.
This is at the root of many modern conflicts between people and pets: people want the joy animals bring, but do not always accept the whole living being in front of them.
We bring dogs into our lives hoping for healing, companionship, and warmth. But once a dog’s instincts do not match our expectations, we may become angry, complain, reject, or fight against the animal.
A guardian may want happiness, yet unintentionally create an outcome in which the person is exhausted, the dog suffers, and both sides live in distress.
Those who truly understand life know that caring for a pet is never a one-sided demand for pleasure. It is a two-way practice of growth. Dogs spend their lives offering pure companionship to help ease human fatigue. In return, we should use tolerance and reverence to protect their authentic nature.
The highest form of care does not erase natural behavior. It does not cut away vitality, suppress instinct, destroy awareness, or numb the mind.
In Teacher Lu’s language, true training can be described in four words: “calibrating the relationship.” It means preserving a dog’s loyalty, protective instinct, alertness, vitality, and purity—while helping the animal learn appropriate responses.
What we need to do is not make a dog silent, numb, or blindly obedient. We should teach the dog to distinguish contexts, settle itself, and respond with balance: to warn courageously when genuine danger is present, and to remain calm when ordinary sounds or daily situations are safe.
When instinct is not extinguished and the animal feels secure, this is the highest form of human–animal coexistence.
I write this article not to criticize guardians, but to help repair relationships that have become misaligned. Today, society’s understanding of pet care can be too narrow, too self-centered, and too reversed.
People mistake loyalty and natural instinct for faults.They mistake a living being’s nature for pathology.They mistake a vibrant life for a toy.
Much of the mutual harm comes from three misunderstandings.
First: Mistaking taking for companionship
Too many people keep dogs only to feel happy or to receive comfort. They want to be healed but are unwilling to offer patience and understanding. Once an animal has emotions, instincts, or individuality, they see it as a burden or inconvenience.
Second: Mistaking suppression for training
True training is guidance toward safety and calm—not the destruction of natural behavior. Making a living being numb and submissive is not excellence; it is the loss of vitality and trust.
Third: Mistaking a living being for an object
Pets feel pain, fear, grievance, suppression, sadness, and uncertainty. They may not speak with words, but they can carry the full weight of human emotion, criticism, rejection, and restraint.
Long-term suppression of an animal’s nature harms both sides. The animal may become emotionally wounded, fearful, stressed, and withdrawn. The guardian may lose compassion, gentleness, and patience, becoming increasingly irritated and internally exhausted.
When you suppress an animal’s nature, you may also deplete your own capacity for kindness. When you destroy its vitality, life may return to you as conflict and pain.
The best relationship between a guardian and a pet is one in which both help each other grow.
Pets are like children: pure, loyal, sincere, and capable of unconditional trust. When they enter your home, they place their lives in your care. They do not understand all human rules. They understand protection, loyalty, companionship, and dependence.
Mature pet care means allowing an animal to have its nature without allowing harmful behavior to go unaddressed. It means accepting instinct while guiding the animal toward appropriate limits.
It means not loving and hurting one another.It means not draining one another.
When you protect an animal’s spirit, it can bring healing into your life.When you accept its authentic nature, it can deepen your own gentleness.
The highest form of pet care is not domination. It is helping a living being flourish.
When natural behavior is not crushed, life can resonate.When people and animals treat one another with gentleness, they can remain companions for a lifetime.
— Author: Lu Xia
Begin a More Compassionate Journey With Your Pet
Your pet is more than a companion—they are a living being with needs, emotions, and a unique relationship with your family.
The Healing Circle Foundation, guided by Teacher Lu Xia’s philosophy, offers gentle pet-and-family wellness experiences that support reflection, mindful connection, and compassionate daily care.
Begin with a Pet & Family Wellness Consultation to explore your concerns, strengthen communication and trust, and discover supportive next steps for your household.
Important: Our programs are complementary wellness and educational services. They do not replace veterinary diagnosis, medical treatment, behavior modification, rabies vaccination, emergency services, or professional search-and-recovery efforts for a lost pet. If your pet is ill, injured, suddenly behaving differently, fearful, aggressive, or in distress, contact a licensed veterinarian or qualified animal-behavior professional.
Request a Pet & Family Wellness Consultation
Explore Pet Wellness Programs
Find the right support
If you are seeking… | Start here |
A calmer, more connected relationship with your pet | Pet & Family Wellness Consultation |
Support understanding your pet’s routines, signals, or emotional needs | Animal Communication and Mindful Connection Session |
Gentle support for a pet adjusting after a move, adoption, family change, or stressful experience | Pet Wellness and Transition Support |
Guidance for grief after the loss of a beloved pet | Pet Loss and Family Grief Support |
Community learning for pet guardians | Pet Awareness Workshops |
A program for a shelter, rescue, pet business, school, or community organization | Partnership and Community Program Inquiry |
For Pet Guardians
Whether you are welcoming a new pet, adjusting to a change at home, seeking a deeper bond, or grieving a beloved companion, you do not have to navigate the journey alone.
Explore Teacher Lu Xia’s gentle, heart-centered approach to pet-and-family wellness through consultations, mindful connection sessions, educational workshops, and community events.
For Organizations and Community Partners
The Healing Circle Foundation welcomes collaboration with organizations that share a commitment to animal welfare, humane education, responsible pet guardianship, and stronger human–animal bonds.
Together, we can create:
Pet-wellness education events and community conversations
Mindful pet-and-family connection workshops
Pet guardian support circles
Compassionate care and grief-support resources
Sponsored community sessions for pet families
Collaborative outreach with shelters, rescues, trainers, groomers, and animal-welfare organizations
Tell us about your organization, the community you serve, and the type of pet-and-family program you would like to explore.
Your Pet’s Well-Being Begins With Connection
Explore compassionate pet-and-family wellness, education, and community programs with Teacher Lu Xia and The Healing Circle Foundation.
Wellness and safety note: Healing Circle Foundation services are educational and complementary wellness offerings. They do not diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent medical or behavioral conditions and do not replace licensed veterinary care, animal behavior services, vaccination, emergency response, or lost-pet recovery efforts.
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